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Oct. 14th, 2009

11:00 pm - I need to vent

I need to vent to someone and well this is it! I had an awful day at work because I got squealed on by one of my coworkers. I put my head down for a minute because I was having trouble staying awake (I sit in front of a computer and type boring doctors all day) and was starting to feel headachy so...I rested my head for a minute and she told the boss. She does this same thing all the time and nobody blew the whistle on her, but she felt inclined to tattle on me. I thought we were in the workplace to build each other up not tear each other down. I  also am frustrated with the work situation because everybody else's "STUFF" seems to come before me coming home to work and me saving some extra money by not having to pay an actual DayCare facility. I have been trying to get home for nearly 10 months now and its really starting to piss me off that they keep bumping me back. Also, Joe and I have not been intimate in more than a month, I am about to get my period and I am feeling a little bit bitchy! So, I guess I am a sexually frustrated menustral newbie transcriptionist who is about ready to pull out her keyboard and go manic on their asses!

Phew. I feel better.

Current Mood: crankycranky

Aug. 3rd, 2009

09:42 pm - Writer's Block: Do Not Open Until 2059

If you were to make a time capsule today to be opened in 50 years, what would you put in it?
I would put in pictures from our wedding and of my kids as babies and of us doing family things; my high school letterman jacket and the margarita glass key chain from our honeymoon in FL; I would put in something that my mom gave me like the Black Hills Gold ring I got when I was 8 and something my dad gave me like my last Parachute Adams fly. There are too many sentimental things I would want to put in there, too many to decide but I think that about covers it really. I would put in something special to remind me of each person I loved in my life.

Current Mood: melancholymelancholy

May. 12th, 2009

09:54 pm - I am more adept than I thought.

Joe and I butchered our unwanted roosters last week and it was not as bad as we thought it would be. We just took the proverbal bull by the horns and just did it. We were prepared, equipped and yet totally unschooled but nonetheless we took a chance and it turned out great. The roosters were ganging up on the hens and as a result the layers have no feathers on their backs....So, we thinned the flock a little. We just did it and proved to ourselves again that we make a pretty good team and can tackle just about anything.

I hope the same bodes true when it comes to teenagers in like 3 days. We'll see. Cheers.

Current Location: Johnson Ranch
Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished

Apr. 13th, 2009

09:49 pm

So, I have not talked about this much because I was not sure it would happen so I kept it quiet as to minimize the let down if there were to be one. My mother has officially moved to Idaho. To Lewiston actually and all of her household things are stacked in our garage. Part of me is really excited to have her here, but there is still a part of me that worries whether this will really work out or not. I know I should have faith and just let whatever will be be, but sometimes that is easier said than done. My biggest fear is that she will turn around and go home just after we all have gotten used to her being so close. I want this to work out so bad and I feel bad that I have doubts that it will, however, little they are. And there is one more thing....My parents are seeing each other exclusively and may try to work out there relationship again for the long run. It worries me that she will give in and put herself on the back burner again to please dad. I know that he is the love of her life and neither one of them wants to be without the other, but they both need to think of what is best for them individually and together. Dad is talking more and more about making a change of his own, but he has a lot of HUGE obstacles to overcome before that happens. The most prominent being his fear and avoidance of change. That might be a problem when that is what you are trying to do. I know that whatever will be will be and I just hope that it works out the way they want it to. Mama is so special to me and she loves these little kids of mine so much and it is so important to all of us that she is in our lives and the same goes for my Dad, more than words can say I love that man and want him to be a prominent fixture in my children's lives not to mention mine. I love my parents and want them to be happy first and foremost, but is it selfish for me to want them in my life together so that I will be happy too?

Mom was only here a week and I think we might have rubbed each other the wrong way a few times. She does not deal with fussy kids well at all. Maybe she did better when she was younger, but now when there is even  a hint of whines or the potential for tears she gets paniced. It's crazy and I do not have time to carry my kids around all the time. Somebody at daycare is toting Sophie and she is getting very used to being packed. It's not good I tell ya. Anyway, I love my mother but sometimes she drives me crazy; however, I love the fact that our relationship has evolved from just mother and daughter to the best of friends. So, now as an adult I can tell her tactfully to knock it off or whatever mom! Adjustments are being made on everybody's part and I am so glad. Really.

Current Location: just here

Feb. 6th, 2009

04:48 pm

Well, my drug test results came back clean, like I was worried and I am scheduled to go to Hospital Orientation on Monday. I am not looking forward to sitting in a classroom for 8 hours, but it'll be like college again (yeah right!). Then I am to start working/training on the 17th. I will have to work weekdays from 8-5pm while they train me but it shouldn't take too long. After  I am "trained" I will start working the swing shift of 2:30 to 10:30pm. I have daycare lined up and my wondeful Sister-in-law to help me fill in the gaps. So, I think this should work. I am really excited to start and hope that the two weeks I have to wait will go by fast. There is still laundry and dishes to do until then so I am sure I will keep busy.

No real drama or news around here. The chickens are getting beat to hell by the over aggressive Roosters so we are trying to find someone to either take them or help us butcher them. I have no idea how to go about butchering chickens and am not looking forward to the prospect of doing it ourselves. A friend of mine told me yesterday that she thinks it would be much easier just to go to the store and buy chicken, and I am beginning to agree. So, we'll see what happens.

Anybody know how to butcher a chicken? Advice welcome.

I have the SpongeBob theme stuck in my head! Get out evil one, get out I SAY!

Current Mood: lazylazy

Feb. 2nd, 2009

10:03 pm - YES!!!!

I GOT THE JOB!!!!!  <HAPPY DANCE>

Now, there are some logistical things to work out, but I know we can do it. I have to go for a drug test tomorrow and once they get those results back and check a few references, I can start work. I will have to work the day shift while I get accustomed to a new system, but after that I will work Sun, Mon and Tues 2:30pm to 10:30pm. It's going to be an adjustment, but we'll get it done. Joe's stister isn't working at the moment and even when she is, she is more than willing to help me with the kids. There is a daycare center at the hospital building so they will go there until Auntie M (that's what we call Arlene) or Joe can pick them up. Eventually, I can move my work to home but if I do that I can't be the primary caregiver for the kiddies, so will have to have someone here anyway. So, taking them to the daycare and going into the office to work seems the most logical at this point.

I am super excited to see this all come together and actually put my transcriptionist skills to work. And the fact that I will be getting a paycheck again just adds to my giddyness.

Next order of business:
Pee test tomorrow.

Wish me luck!

Current Location: home
Current Mood: excitedexcited

Jan. 28th, 2009

04:51 pm - Interview

Well, I went to the interview and think it went really really well. The typing test was a listen to dictation and type what was said test and it was almost easier than the dictations I had been typing while studying last summer. I feel really good about what I said and my typing ability for transcription so I hope the interviewer feels the same way. There are 11 more interviews this week so should hear something on Monday. Or at least that's what she is striving for. So, we will keep our fingers crossed until then. I really want this job so I hope I hope I hope that I stand out from the crowd.

Thanks for all the cheers. Have house chores to do, as I am still the little house wifie.

P.S. Anybody want eggs?

Current Mood: hopefulhopeful

Jan. 27th, 2009

12:41 pm - Tomorrow...

I have a job interview tomorrow for a medical transcriptionist position with the hospital in Lewiston. Extra thoughts, prayers, whatevers are needed. Keep you fingers crossed that all the stars align and they like me. I have to take a typing test too and that's what I am most nervous about. I want to be as fast and as accurate as I can be. Here's hopin'!

I am off to practice typing. Wish me luck!

Current Mood: excitedexcited

Jan. 21st, 2009

12:37 pm - Amazing...

Its amazing how incredible blessed I am. I'm reminded of that everyday when one of the kids does something or says something that makes me stop and think, "That's my baby." It's an awesome feeling. Sophie said Dada yesterday with recognition behind it. She reached for Joe and said "Dada." It was incredible and then we wanted her to repeat it a million more times and of course she wouldn't.

They are so perfect and it is so fun watching them learn and grow everyday. Sophie is on the verge of walking and then really nothing will be safe.

I was just holding her a little while ago and when I looked down at her perfect little face it made me want to hold on forever. I know they will grow and become less dependent on mom and I want that, but it's incredible to snuggle and marvel at their babiness now.

Reveling in my children's perfectness makes me think of Baby Lauren. I was able to see her while I was in AK and all the emotion I had been storing up came out as I knew it would. I just sat down beside her little chair and cried. I stroked her back and talked to her. I felt the gumball sized apples of her cheeks and the nothingness of her weight in my arms. I looked in her milky blue eyes and cried some more. I traced her misshapen mouth and ruffled her patchy hair. I listened to her labored breath and prayed. I prayed that she would know she little life wouldn't be forgotten, that her life wouldn't be for not and that the next time we see her on the new earth she will be the beautiful healthy baby girl God intended her to be. I told her it was alright for her to just go to sleep. I told her that she could let go and be at peace, it was alright and we would understand and be alright without her. Such a little life to have such a heavy burden. It makes me treasure every minute with my amazing children every second of every day. I have such a heart for Todd, my cousin and his family. They won't ever see Lauren take her first steps, or speak her first words. And for that I am sorry the most. They will miss all the wonderful things and instead remember the struggles and hardships of Lauren's short little life. Their son Garrett takes away some of the strain, if only for a little while. But thank goodness for him as they will wrap themselves in his growth and learning when Lauren does leave this earth. I can't imagine how hard it is to watch your baby die each day. I can't even begin to imagine their pain, but I truly feel for them with all my heart.

I am going to hug my children everyday in the hope that they will know how much they are loved, admired and adored. I want my friends to feel that way too. It's time for a Dana day.

Tags:
Current Location: home
Current Mood: gratefulgrateful

Jan. 12th, 2009

10:31 pm - Note to self....

Avoid water distiller salesmen. Better yet avoid county fair booth gimmicks with telephone booths full of airborne cash. That'll teach me. Who wants free money anyway.

I practically kicked him out of our house. There was no sale on Pheasant Loop Road tonight.

Humph.

Teach him to irritate a tired mother of two on a very tight budget.

Take that bad, irritating water sales guy.

Current Location: home
Current Mood: irritatedirritated

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